Son of Dracula (1943)

1) These mid 20th century movies are growing on me (well sort of). Maybe it's because the plots are pretty easy to understand and the length of the movies accommodates my ADD.

2) That being said I still don't know why it's titled "Son of Dracula." I don't remember him popping a kid out in the original, but I guess I didn't see the Dracula's Daughter one either so maybe I am just out of the loop.

3) That was some crazy weird soap opera love triangle stuff going on here. I mean, the chick ditches her boyfriend for Alucard (which is Dracula spelled backwards lol), but only to become immortal so she can then turn the bf into a vampire and TKO the actual dracula. And then at tha end she gets crossed by her bf. You give someone the gift of immortality and they take it out on you by destroying your coffin smh...

4) I guess this was the first Dracula movie to ever show a person transforming into a bat. Must've been wild in 1943 lol.

B-

Abraham Lincoln: Vampire Hunter

1) Not really much of a horror movie. I mean, I get that there are vampires in it and all, but it's not really spooky, especially since it's supposed to be historical (well in a fictional sense). Most of the movies are just these action shots that are overshot in slow motion. If there wasn't so much slow motion the movie would probably get over faster lol.

2) I'd go on a rant about watching these 3D movies without the 3D effect but I've barked up that tree too many times before.

3) How tight was it when Papa Doc from the hit motion picture 8 Mile popped up in it. He automatically bumps up every movie rating he's in, he's just so tight (see What's Your Number for more evidence of this).  Come to think of it, he probably just should've challenged the vampires to rap battles. I mean, it's kind of like an old school duel, but still gives an appropriate shout out to his role in 8 mile.

4) Although this movie wasn't generally reviewed well by the critics, I do fear that it could spark a wreck of spinoffs that could be horrible. Imagine 'William Taft: Bathtub Layer'. The possibilities to Linc (link get it?) presidents to horror icons makes me nervous about the future of these movies.

C-

Near Dark

1) Really kind of an odd vampire movie. I'm not sure they ever mention the word vampires and except for the sun, they don't really show any anti-vampire techniques being rampantly used.

2) Vampire movies always give me the willies. I have a thing about the back of my ankles, my wrists, and my neck that freak me out when people touch me there. When she just bites him at the beginning of the movie I almost jumped out of my bed lol. And then the rest of the movie he just sucks on her wrist. Super creepy.

3) It's really tight when that driver goes missing. The guy is confused why the driver went to Kansas while he shoulda been in Waco, Texas. For anyone that's ever been to Waco, there's no mystery why you'd rather be in Kansas. I guess if you wanna get shit on by birds and cage an animal on your campus I understand. Kind of tight that the final showdown takes place in Kansas too.

4) Maybe it's just the Oklahoma/Texas crowd, but why on earth don't more people just GTFO when they see the vampires? It's like they're chilling at a bar and then vampires start biting people and everyone just stays chilling. I've only been at tha bar a few times when a fight broke out and generally it scared the hell out of me. I dunno why they're sticking around for the whole thing.

5) Pretty tight there's a little RomCom to it too with that dude and chick.

Good stuff,

A-

Nosferatu

1) We watched this because it was on that jitsu 'great movies' list, but I know all the horror fans always say that it's one of the ones that started the horror genre so I guess it was good to watch.

2) Obvi the silent/black and white genre hasn't been great (I'll try to quit sounding like a broken record about this stuff), but this one was a little more jitsu because they had these subtitles on during the whole movie.

But they weren't really subtitles since it was silent, it was just like a commentary about what was going on during the movie. Come to think of it, this movie was just like one giant animated story book.

3) The other problem with the subtitles is that they were in some super old font that was hard to read. They should've put it in Century Gothic (@cormatt). And it was going way too fast to keep up with. I know my reading comprehension skills are below average, but even Alan had trouble keeping up with it.

4) The Nosferatu guy was pretty fucking spooky, especially given how old the movie is. I guess I kind of wonder why those people keep hanging out with the creepy dude who keeps lunging at blood, but to each their own.

Given that they couldn't add sound/color to it, still a solid movie given how old it is.

B-

Fright Night (2011)

1) Not as good as the original Fright Night but it was still pretty solid.

2) Couple of things I never realized about vampires. I didn't realize that you have to have invited them into your house before they are allowed in. Pretty crazy. I also didn't realize that some of the n00bs that get turned into vampires don't immediately make it rain on you (like the blonde strip club chick).

3) I kind of wish both this and the original would've left out the whole part about them hunting down the vampire expert guy. He only added a bunch of irrelevant side mumbo jumbo to both movies.

4) Did anyone catch Lisa Loeb's appearance in this movie? She had that tight mid-nineties song called Stay that was super tight. Kinda crazy she just popped into this movie after being off the grid for awhile.

Good stuff, but not near the original

B+

Dracula

1) Turn your speakers up lol. I don't know if it's our TV, or netflix, or what, but I couldn't understand like half the shit they were saying the whole movie.

2) Good to see that the crazy guy who always warns of bad stuff thats about to go down originated here. That guy was getting annoying but then I realized that back in the 1930s that probably wasn't in every horror movie like it is today lol.

3) These black and white movies are almost always mediocre. Maybe it's just that my ADD needs shiny things and music but I get so bored during these movies. There's hardly any external noise, colors, or generally tightthings going down.

4) That being said it was still pretty good. I mean, it spawned a whole generation of tight movies/general halloween shenanigans.

Oh, and good stuff for being so short lol

B

Fright Night Trailer

Dear god it looks tight

Let Me In

WGBW long jitsu sickness this week. Almost back up to full speed.

1) The whole movie was pretty depressing. The kid's moms sad with him, the vampire and dad are always fighting and the kids life at school is super depressing. Paired up with the slow sad music its hard to stay upbeat during this one. The bullying scenes were fucked up too.

2) Creepy shit at the beginning with the Michael Myers mask. I'm gonna have to post about all the movies that rep the mask at some point. It never fucking goes out of style.

3) I'm not wild about vampire movies either but I guess this one was okay. The kids were good actors and shit and all the actual vampire scenes were pretty crazy.

Despite it's depressing shenanigans, light years ahead of the other vampire jitsu I've seen (except for Fright Night obvi).

C+

Fright Night

1) Overall was super solid. I got ADD the first time I saw it but god damn was it good the second time.

2) It's hard to take the little chick seriously since she turns into the jitsu wife in Married...with Children: The Complete Tenth Season but I'm sure she got her acting boost from this gem of a movie.

3) There was some jitsu. What's up with the 30 year old making moves at the high school prom? Where was the school security there? And the vampire slayer guy was really jitsu. That one dude yelled boo at him and he took cover. I wouldn't recommend calling him for any future vampire slayings.

4) The special effects were ho hum. Theres a scene when the police leave the vampire house without finding anything wrong and then there are waves of fog just fucking pouring out of every opening of the house. Either bad special effects or those police are due for some serious jitsu for not figuring out that something fucked up was going on in the creepy fog machine house on the corner.

Best vampire movie by far

A-