Mother's Day (2010)

1) I meant to review this on the actual Mother's Day but I was being too good of a son to remember lol.

2) Eh. I'm not sure this was as sick as of a torture porn movie as the original Last House on the Left but still seemed to have the same kind of M.O. Only here it's just some yahoos that go back to their moms house after a failed bank robbery and realize that other people have taken over the house after its been foreclosed.

3) I don't understand why the bad guys have to up the ante so much after they get back to the house. I mean, I know these people might have stolen your mom's money/house and know that you robbed someone, but why play all the Sawesque tricks on everyone?

4) The other problem with this movie's generic plot is that it adds way too many story lines to keep track of. There's like 14 people in the basement, more victims outside the house, the mom, and all those misfit sons. My ADD makes it hard enough to keep up with all these other movies- this one was (almost) too much.

Nothing wild about this one,

C

The Devil Inside

1) These exorcist movies are real hit or miss. This one reminded me of a slightly better version of Anneliese: The Exorcist Tapes: bad ending and a poor attempt at showing 'actual' footage.

2) And this might have been one of the worst movie endings of all time. I mean, I get having everyone just be possessed and stuff but what was up with the "for more information about this ongoing investigation please visit the following website"? They couldn't just say 'we never knew what happened' but had to try and get viewers to go log on to some website to generate more money for this mediocre movie? SMH.

3) In the interests of full disclosure, I did not go log onto this other website so maybe I didn't see the actual movie ending. I didn't want to endorse this ending anymore lol.

4) I guess for all the possession movies that have been floating around this one was at least kind of original. I didn't get board and they never really explored this plot angle before.

Meh,

C-

The Five-Year Engagement

1) After pondering this over I'm convinced this is probably one of my top 5 romcoms of all time. Obvi it's a little more comedy than romance, but it's still top notch stuff.

2) Despite all the rumors of Buffalo crying, this one actually made me close. The scene at the end where they get back together just makes everything end in such a tight way. I really thought that there was a chance they weren't going to get back together (which would have obvi ruined the movie) so when they got back together I was pretty moved lol.

3) The shit was super funny too. The video clip with Billy Joel had me rolling on the floor and the quasi reference to the Saw movies during the psychology experiment was good shit.

4) Even my complaints about the movie are fairly immaterial. It was pretty goofy that the guy who played the crazy roommate in Notting Hill was the professor who is the main countervailing love interest lol. And the part where Jason Segel goes all caveman is pretty goofy too.

Nonetheless, definitely something to write home about,

A+

The Girl Next Door (2007)

1) Uhhhh, no more of these smh. I'm not wild about all the torturesque horror movies (see Last House on the Left (2009) and I Spit on Your Grave (1978)), and this was more of the same. There's some girl who has to go live with her aunt and messed up cousins who do all of this screwed up stuff to her. Uhhhhhh.

2) Two thumbs down on the ending too. I mean the girl just dies after all of that horrible stuff happens to her? I guess the only positive part is that some guy named Officer Jennings arrests her so hopefully she gets some legal justice.

3) SMH at this movie for ruining the sister from Sixteen Candles. It was hard to take her serious as some psycho at first, but now I think this movie would make it hard for me to sit through Sixteen Candles again.

4) And what on earth is that guy talking about in the end? "Sometimes the past is a blessing or curse?" How would this sad, depressing, evil story be a blessing for anyone? How a torture movie can try to portray itself as a movie with some touching message at the end is beyond me.

This subset of horror movies sucks,

F

The Vow

Whats good blog world. I'm really sorry for the extended delay. The whole last semester of finals in law school and job thing was really busy smh lol.

1) This was pretty mediocre. I'm all about the romance movies, but they just screw this up. I never understood why they make a movie that they bill as one of the all time great love stories and then dont have them fall back in love at the end of the movie. I mean, I get it- they agree to go on a date or something but besides that it's like why don't we just go the whole 9 yards and have them fall in love again?

2) Some of the movie had some stupid parts too. The girls best friend sleeps with her dad? And the girl's old dick finance is the guy from The Strangers? Come on now.

3) It still had some good cheesy parts that I obvi enjoy. Like the line where he says that she fell in love with him once and he'll get her to do it again. Good stuff.

With Channing Tatum and Rachel McAdams it's hard to go too far off course,

C

The Cabin in the Woods

1) I've started doing this thing where I try to sit around for a day after a movie to collect my thoughts about it so I don't jump to any conclusions lol. After a few days, I've figured out the movie is pretty solid. I actually feel (sort of) qualified to review this since I actually have seen 1400 horror movies and get (most of) the references made in the movie.

2) I was really impressed with all the shout-outs to other horror movies. The whole cabin/scary trees had to have been a reference to The Evil Dead, the 3 spooky looking people with masks was The Strangers, the set up with the creepy guy on the side of the road has been in almost every Friday the 13th movie, and finally (and most obviously) that pinhead look alike from Hellraiser. I think if I rewatched it I'd probably see a wreck of more people popping out.

3) I think the part that made me think it was goofy the most was just the whole 'there are evil gods who need a specific sacrifice or we're going to destroy the earth'. It also just seems implausible that these experiments were being deployed all throughout the world and not one of them was successful. You think these dudes would concentrate a lot more at work if the fate of the earth depended on it.

4) That being said it was pretty tight. Super scary creatures in it, mixed in humor really well and generally was a good critical look at horror movies while accentuating what was good in them.

I'll be tuning in,

A

Funny Games

1) I saw this movie back in tha day with @Angelo when I was in the horrible state of Kentucky. I sort of like revisiting movies several after the fact to see if I've matured at all lol (see Vacancy).

2) It was better than I remembered, but still just sadistic as shit. I mean, they really just shot that little kid, how messed up is that? I'm not too gung ho about all the movies that have these screwed up endings.

3) I didn't really get all the stupid shenanigans in the movie. Like where he keeps talking to the camera, or rewinds the fucking movie after that guy gets TKO'd. I dunno, maybe it's some movie stuff I don't understand lol. Someone should explain what the purpose of them calling each other different names was, that didn't make much sense either.

4) I never put 2 and 2 together to figure out that the smart psycho guy is one of the main character off of Boardwalk Empire. I need to think outside the box more lol.

All that being said it was pretty original (minus the fact that it was an exact remake of the foreign version lol),

C

Apollo 18

1) I realized I've gotten away from the horror movies lately bw and I apologize. I apologize again if you've seen this movie because it is really awful.

2) I'm a big fan of aliens and shit (well not really Scifi movies but actual Alien stories). But man is this movie bad. The aliens aren't scary looking, they're like these little stupid spider things. It befuddles me why the astronauts don't just crush the little shits. I mean, if you are a big enough hoss to go to space you think you could at least TKO these little creatures.

3) It was like a horrible version of The Blair Witch Project that just takes place in space. I mean, nobody could really think this was "found footage" that somehow got leaked of the astronauts getting TKO'd on the moon.I mean, if they can keep Roswell under wraps they can obvi keep this on lock.

4) I guess it's sort of original- I mean, astronauts get attacked in space. That's one small step for originality, one giant waste of time.

D

Airplane

Wgbw, sorry for tha delays- last week was super busy lol.

1) I still don't think this is a really famous movie. Obvi everyone has a better taste in my movies than me, but I think I'm generally more cognizant of movie stuff than most people. But then again maybe not. I think maybe I'd heard the Shirly line but who knows.

2) It was super tight that the host from Unsolved Mysteries was in the movie. He was also in the hit film Beavis and Butthead Do America as that FBI agent. Unsolved Mysteries was such a tight show- especially when they covered all the old UFO stories.

3) Speaking of B&B- this movie was pretty good just because of all the inappropriate 12 year old jokes. It was like a crappier version of B&.

4) The best part of the movie was obvi the whole Kareem Abdul Jabbar scene. That shit still cracks me up just thinking about it.

B-

A Few Good Men

1) Top notch stuff. Obvi I have a thing for courtroom dramas and this is one of the best. Really just solid shit all around.

2) I kinda wished they woulda developed the Demi Moore/Tom Cruise love story a little bit more too. Like it's obvi that there's some chemistry with them then they go out on that date but you never really know if it takes off after that.

3) Obvi the whole last scene is really solid. It was so solid that DB said it in a debate round one time. But the often overlooked part of the last scene is that he gets to say COLONEL like 132 times during his direct of COLONEL Jessup. Now that was pretty tight.

4) Oh yeah the line where he asks if she was sick the day they taught law at lawschool was pretty legit too.

A+

Kick-Ass

What's good tweet fans coming at you live from Uncle Dave's living room lol.

1) A lot gorier than I anticipated. Just people getting gruesomely slaughtered everywhere. Probably a good reason to stay out of the drug trade lol.

2) I'm not totally wild about these Scifi/comic movies (obvi) but this was pretty good. The ending was pretty good with that song from 10 Things I hate About You came on. One of the only bad parts of the movie was when they mentioned that horribly overrated American Beauty.

3) It's super tight when they start to gii- good for Dave. Although the alley part was kinda gross, I still enjoy the RomCom parts in movies.

4) How tight is it that the guy's name is Dave. Speaking of Dave, he thought the best part was when the chick made it rain and called that kid gay.

B+

Karate Kid, Part III

1) I've been on a Karate Kid bender lately. The third one's pretty tight because that jitsu guy from the first movie comes back with an even more jitsu friend. Don't get me wrong, this movie is tight. But holy god is the pony-tailed guy stupid. And talk about holding a grudge, this guy is really gungho about getting revenge on a retired Japanese guy and his 17 year old friend. He just needs to let it go lol.

2) The bonsai tree part is pretty stupid lol. I don't know what the obsession is with the bonsai trees.

3) Man Danielson is a ladies man in all these movies. The crazy part is they take place like within a year of each other. He moves into CA in the original one and meets that chick in like 2 seconds, gets hit on by the girl in Japan, and then makes moves the day he gets off the plane in the third one. I guess he's like Jon and just can't turn it off.

4) The scene with the heights made my feet tingly lol. I can't stand heights.

Top notch,

A

The Sitter

1) Eh, I thought it had a good setup. There was a bunch of inappropriate stuff in the first like 15 minutes, all the kids were pretty funny, and Jonah Hill was solid.

2) I guess it's just that these movies with super ridiculous plot lines get kinda out of control. I mean, I sort of understand that he'd have to take the kids to go meet his lady friend. But why would you stop to get drugs/get into fights/ generally screw around. I've never babysitted (obvi) but it can't be that hard to keep track of 3 kids for a few hours.

3) The end was kind of stupid too. Don't get it twisted, I love romcomesque endings but his line at the end of tha movie that they should just go walk because its such a great night out is pretty jitsu.

4) Did anyone notice his quasi-ladyfriend at the beginning was Meadow's friend on the Sopranos? The Sopranos rules.

For an hour and 21 minutes, it was okay

C+

Hollow Man

Wgbw, sorry for the delays again, I was actually busy this last week lol.

1) Pretty solid movie overall. I know there was that old jitsu Hollow Man movie, but obvi I'm a big fan of the newer remixes.

2) Easily one of Kevin Bacon's best movies outside of A Few Good Men and Wild Things. I don't know why he always has to play the creepy dickbag guy in movies, but I guess he's good at it lol.

3) I've never been a fan of the sexual assault scenes and this movie was no different. I don't know why they could have just audibled out of that and just made him a traditional horror villain (I just learned how to spell villain lol).

4) The only other jitsu part in the movie is why they let Kevin Bacon be the one to go invisible. I get that he was the leader of the project, and the smart guy and all, but if you thought someone was creepy and could do a bunch of crazy stuff while visible, I dunno why you think it would be a good idea to let him out on town invisibly.

Pretty solid,

B

Moneyball

1) I should preface this with a caveat: these Academy Awardesque movies will not continue to pop up on the blog for much longer. The other day Alan agreed to watch No One Would Tell if I watched this. So don't get your hopes up thinking these 'good' movies will keep being reviewed lol.

2) I obvi like a lot of sports movies (The 2008 NCAA Championship, White Men Can't Jump, Rocky), but this one wasn't quite up to par.

3) I even like the Sports documentary genre, but this one just seemed kinda slow. Like I get it, they need to struggle, implement the new system, struggle some more, and then show that it pays off. Like a lot of other movies, I think this one just could've cut to the chase a little quicker. And even the side story with his daughter was kind of boring/irrelevant.

4) I think I like Jonah Hill better in some of his other good shit like Knocked Up or Superbad. It's hard to take him seriously as some mathematics guru after seeing him in some of the other raunchy shit he's in.

Nothing to write home about,

C-

The Artist

1) What a beautiful film. Peter Bradshaw of the Guardian best described my own feelings towards the movie ""had me on my feet cheering throughout the final credits- I can't wait to see it again".

2) Actually I don't know what I enjoyed more: a) the fact that it was 'French-Romantic-Comedy-Drama', b) that there was no people talking, or c) that it was in black and white.

3) After seeing this I really think all films should go back to their silent and black and white days.

Actually no I don't. I can't imagine wanting to throw away my computer and type on some giant 1988 computer in my parent's basement that took an hour to boot up- why would you want to go back to crappier times in films?

4) Can you imagine the critics reactions at the time in the 1920s in France? They'd be like 'this is the dumbest movie ever- we were overjoyed when silent films went away!' And later generations would ask 'why on earth is this fucking movie in black and white? I thought that shit went out of style years ago.'

5) To be fair, I didn't actually watch this movie. I only watched the super long trailer that nearly put me to sleep. It would take an act of God to make me sit through an hour and 40 minutes of this.

As Petey would say, you can take this film, and give it back to the 1920s.

F

The Karate Kid

They referenced this on EBD last night and it reminded me how tight this movie was.

1) So much good shit to say about this movie, it's hard to know where to start. I've obvi got a thing for the underdog movies (see 8 Mile and The Fighter), and this one was right up that alley. Throw in some teen RomCom and this movie rules.

2) Mr. Miyagi was super tight the whole movie too.

3) The only sort of jitsu part of the movie is Daniel's lack of anger control. I mean, the kid is constantly snapping at his mom, miyagi, and his lady friend. He needs to learn how to wooooo sawwwww.

4) This movie also gave rise to one of the tightest lines in motion picture history (I'da added it to the list but it slipped my mind lol). For the bw's viewing pleasure: GET HIM A BODY BAG, YEAHHHHHHHHHH

Top notch stuff,

A+

No One Would Tell

1) Dj tanner from full house and fred savage – how could this movie get any better? Although I dunno why he’s always playing creepy roles now. He played this serial rapist in L & O SVU a few years back and now this.

2) I do have a thing for some lifetime movies- this fit the bill pretty good, but I kind of wish some of them were more uplifting. Reminded me of a less tight version of Fear but without the vigilante justice at the end. Lifetime movies are always pretty good about the life lessons.

3) I was also a fan of all the wrestling scenes at the beginning, but whoever the wrestling trainer for the actors in the movie was pretty bad, it was just the same 2 moves over and over again lol.

4) LOL @ Sally Jesse Raphael being the judge. However, it was very lifetimesque of her to give that speech at the end preaching against domestic violence. Clutch public service announcement.

Still not a fan of all the DV scenes,

C

Leap Year

1) Wgbw, I know I'm a day late but yesterday was a scenic Leap Year so this movie fit the bill.

2) The first 45 minutes of this movie were pretty bad. All they do is fight and hate each other and it just gets annoying. It's kind of weird because I really thought Letters to Juliet was a sick movie and that's got kind of the same MO. I guess the difference was in LTJ she didn't really hate him the whole time and then they were just embarking on this love story the whole time.

3) It more reminded me of the turd of a movie The Wedding Date because this movie was pretty bad too, took place in a different country, and the guy in it was just generally annoying the whole time.

4) I'm all for a predictable movie and all, but you wouldn't have to be Nostradamus to figure this one out. And most PG movies are too lame/lack any funny stuff to go too high up on the ladder.

Jitsu,

D+

Eastbound and Down Season 3

1) Obvi this review is just after the first 2 eps, so don't get your hopes up that I have some inside pass to see all the rest of the good shit this season holds.

2) That being said it's been kinda below average for KP so far. Don't get it twisted, this show is still light years ahead of almost anything else on tv so far, but compared to season 1 & 2 it's been lagging.

3) I'm obvi glad they brought back April (for obvi reasons), but I dunno if I'm sold on Jason Sodukawhateverhisnameis yet. Hopefully during these next few eps April pops back up.

4) Big shout out to Kenny calling the hit show Friends as being part of the Criterion Collection. #yak

Pretty good stuff so far, I'll hold off grading it till it finishes up,

FOE

Lover's Lane

1) Pretty ho-hum. I'm all in the favor of the holiday-genre horror movies and what not, but these straight to dvd movies that no one has ever heard of are turds.

2) I don't really get it. It's like these guys come up and try to make it rain on these high school kids trying to make love in the car. I'm all for PG-13 stuff and all, but there's got to be better fish to fry. And what's up with his Captain Hook hand?

3) The characters can't seem to put 2 and 2 together either. You think they'd realize that maybe they don't need to go to the makeout spot to gii if you're gonna get TKO'd. I mean, I get that its probably hard to find a place to get down in high school, but don't do it at some spot that kids keep getting killed at.

4) To be honest, I quit paying attention before the end of the movie so I don't really remember what happened, but I won't put myself through that again to figure it out lol.

It was still a horror movie,

D

The Best of the (Hypothetical) Oscars

Wgbw, sorry for the delays. Been busy lately lol.

Every year I think the OSCARS are out to lunch about what actually should have gone down. There's way too many awards to go through with my limited attention span, but here are some historical injustices committed by the academy award people.

1) Best Actor in 2004

Who should've gotten it: Will Smith in the hit movie Bad Boys 2. Need I say more? Not only is this movie super tight, but Will Smith just makes it rain.

Who actually got it: Sean Penn in Mystic River. I've actually never seen this movie, nor do I care to, but I can't imagine Sean Penn was better than Will Smith. The last real tight thing Sean Penn was in was the few Friends eps where he's Ursela's fiance, but even that wasn't close to anything Will Smithesque.

Best Costume Design in 2003

Who should've gotten it: 8 Mile. I hate all the goofy artsy/fartsy stuff in movies, but this one was (obvi) well done. At the end of the movie he's the only one wearing white which highlights his outside appearance to the community. And he keeps repping the hoodie which I'm a big fan of lol.

Who actually got it: one of the jitsu lord of the rings movies. I don't understand why this movie won, I mean, the whole movie is a giant costume. Everyone had fake ears and stuff and generally looked ridiculous. I guess thats more of a problem with the category as a whole, I don't know why they have to have fashion awards for movies smh.

Best animated short file in 1997

Who should've gotten it: Beavis and Butthead Do America. I don't think there's any debate here. This is obviously the greatest animated movie ever.

Who actually got it: Geri's Game. I had never even heard of this movie. It seems like the AA are just trying to fill up nominees instead of actually seeing if the movie was good or not. I really think it'd be okay for them to just be honest and admit that no movie should have even been nominated besides B&B.

Some other random pet peeves. I don't get a whole bunch of these awards.

Best film editing. How would they even know how good a film was edited? Did the watch all the uncut footage and determine that these ones were edited the best? Do they watch the deleted scenes and determine that only the best scenes were included? It doesn't make any sense.

Best score. This is the academy awards not the grammys lol.

Best original screenplay. Is this just who wrote the best movie? I don't really get it.

I won't be tuning in tonight lol.

Valentine

1) The first like 20 minutes of this movie was really good. It's like it sets up some revengeful guy, Katherine Heigl was hanging out, just generally good stuff all around.

2) The ending was pretty creative too; you'd never guess that the alcoholic could pull off all those crazy kills and the nose bleed thing was a pretty good signature move.

3) It doesn't make too much sense why he holds a grudge for so long. I mean, it's just some girls that didn't want to dance with you in junior high- it's not really the end of the world. You think he'd be more mad at the dudes that jumped him at least.

4) Way too much of the movie was focused on these chicks relationship troubles. I get that the movie is called Valentine, but even then none of it was really relevant to the movie.

Mediocre holiday movie,

C

Vacancy

1) I re-watched this for the first time since 2007. Back in the day I used to think that this movie was horrible. After 5 years of maturing, it's actually not bad lol.

2) Don't get it twisted, there are some obvious holes in the plot of the movie. I mean, those blue guys look like they hopped right off that Intel commercial and into this hotel. You could probably just distract them by playing that commercial over and over again.

3) If you were stranded in the middle of nowhere, and some burglar dressed in all black jumped out, why would you let him screw around with your car? Smh. (FWIW the guy was actually one of Reese Witherspoons friends from Sweet Home Alabama.

4) They probably should get a divorce lol, I mean, they argue about if it was a raccoon or a squirrel that they dodged in the road. Who argues about that?

It's hard to take the guy from Old School too seriously, but it was good,

B+

Blue Valentine

Oh dear lord blog world,

1) Talk about some depressing stuff. I always get into this debate with people about RomCom endings. Theres people who think that movies with realistic endings where the people break up are good because they reflect real life (i.e. The Breakup), and theres esteemed movie critics like myself that aren't so pessimistic about the world. I mean, does anyone really enjoy sad things in life? So why on God's green earth would someone be pumped about experiencing it again in a movie lol?

2) And man oh man was this depressing. There's the part where he goes to fight with her at her work, the part where they get in a huge fight in the middle of making love, then Ryan Gosling gets the shit beaten out of him by some dude, and then there's this depressing scene where she starts to get an abortion. I'm not getting political or anything, but just seeing her cry and agonize was :(

3) Whenever I grade movies, I tend to ask myself how often I would watch it again. I can't even begin to fathom how 88% of the 'top critics' on rotten tomatoes could put themselves through this over and over again.

4) I'm know I'm just saying the same thing over and over again, but how would anyone enjoy this? You have the lady friend come over, you sit down and watch this, and then I'm sure you'll both be in a great mood lol. Broken families, drunken fights, and a shitty life, I mean that's how good this movie gets.

5) And how deceiving is the movie poster? "A Love Story"? And them making out? They should've just showed them brawling or something smh.

F

P.S. I Love You

What's good bw, it's almost time for Valentine's Day. Kind of like last year I'll try to floss up some girly movies but I'll throw in a horror related Vday movie too. Anywho,

1) I guess I've never seen a movie that had a plot like this. The guy gets TKO'd at the beginning but has left his lady friend all these preemptive messages to communicate with her after he's gone.

2) Eh, it just kind of dragged on after that. I remember the first time I saw this with an old lady friend, she was just crying the entire movie. I get that it's sad and all but it took awhile for her to go on this "journey".

3) I can't believe no one thought it was creepy. I mean, if someone left me all these messages I think I'd be scared that I was going to get haunted or something.

4) It's pretty solid overall I guess. Phoebe from the hit tv show Friends is in it.

Back in the day I was super excited about this movie and it just didn't live up to the hype,

B-

A Very Harold & Kumar 3D Christmas

1) I hate Christmas lol. The Christmas music in the movie was pretty jitsu. I kind of wish they would've done a Very Harold & Kumar 3D HALLOWEEN instead. That'd be tight. Maria's dad is even that tight maintenance guy on the new Halloween.

2) It didn't have the really tight girly part to it that Harold and Kumar Escape from Guantanamo Bay had but whatever.

3) All the references to the past movies were tight. So were all the real life references to NPH and Kumar. Good stuff all around.

4) I know I just recently went on a rant about how I didn't like over the top movies but this one was tight. I think maybe the difference is that all of the Harold and Kumar movies have been over the top but are still pretty good. And Kumar's lady friend is a total babe.

If only it wasn't about Christmas,

B

30 Minutes or Less

1) Eh. It was pretty mediocre. Although it was only an hour and 23 minutes it didn't have anything really super tight go down in it.

2) It was funny I guess. I'm a big fan of inappropriate humor and this movie had plenty of it. I obvi also love Kenny Powers so it's hard for a movie to go south that has him in it (except for that awful Up in the Air).

3) Part of thing that drives me up the wall with these kind of movies is that they always have to go over the top and then over it some more. It's not enough that the plot is super ridiculous but then the ending gets even stupider. I mean, they had a flamethrower, a bomb, and a giant fuel tank? And all the stupid twists involving who was going to get who? I get that the movie is supposed to be ridiculous, but this was too much.

4) The part where they are watching one of the Friday the 13th movies was pretty cool. What happens is a little too R-rated for me to write about on the blog but it was pretty funny lol.

5) Maybe it was also mediocre because everytime I see that one guy all I can think of is that jitsu movie the social network lol.

I guess it was still funny,

C

Gothika

1) I know I get confused easily, but this one was a barnburner. I mean, so there's this psychiatrist who sees this little girl in the road one night and swerves out of the way. She wakes up and is in her own psych ward and is informed she murdered her husband. She (obvi) has no recollection of it.

2) Thats when it gets confusing. There's like this ghost running around the psych ward who randomly makes appearances. Somehow the dudes who killed the people can summon the ghost somehow. And the ghost can somehow make her blackout? This ghost doesn't make any sense.

3) And why would they put her back in with her patients? That wouldn't make any sense.

4) I mean, I guess it was a semi-unique plot at the time, and Halle Berry was in it. Overall it was just confusing and didn't make any sense.

Wah-wah,

C-

Takedowns and Falls

1) What a tight documentary. Compared to some of the other documentaries I've reviewed, this one was light years ahead of the rest.

2) Part of it is because wrestling fucking rules. It makes me :( that I didn't register to be a ref again this year lol. It was kind of jitsu how they always showed the matches going out of order to make it seem more dramatic and stuff, but I get that it was made for TV lol.

3) They didn't really focus on the 'coach has cancer' part of the storyline. I think the whole point of the movie was to win the coach a state title before he had to retire or whatever but they really downplayed it. That being said, although I'm not crazy about feel-good movies this one was pretty tight.

4) How tight was that Doug guy? He just talked about how he kept getting into juvi trouble, had ADD, and wanted to fight in the UFC. He made the movie super entertaining.

A-

Eyes Wide Shut

What's good blog world, sorry for the delays,

1) Man 2012 has been tight. But this movie maybe the worst movie I've seen in the last 3 years (minus Annie Hall).

2) It's like 3 hours long and nothing happens. It's got to be one of the slowest movies of all time. Like an hour into it all they've done is gone to some dance where they were both bored. For a movie that lasted so long you think they would have some plot development, etc. Nothing.

3) What was the plot of this movie? That Tom Cruise is bored with his sex life so he looks to some weird mystery society for guidance? Is it that he was investigating the weird club the whole time? Or that the one chick died? Either way you look at it nothing gets resolved. I mean, he tells his wife he went to the weird club and then she decides she still loves him.

4) Speaking of which, how horrible would that conversation be? 'Like, honey, I went to this prostitute, and paid her 150 dollars, then spent 300 dollars at this costume store where I witnessed an underage girl being taken advantage of, then strolled off to this mask party that was way out in the boonies where they threatened to hurt you if I told anyone about it so I investigated it.' She'd be like...uhhhhhhhhhhhh.

5) And why was that goddamn piano so loud the whole time? The whole movie they just kept striking the same piano key over and over again really loudly. It was like nails on a chalkboard. I'll bet people were just pouring out of the theater when this movie played back in the day.

F